Tear themselves - Better as in the margin; "break broad for them." It was customary upon the death of a relative to fast, and for the friends and neighbors after a decent delay to come and comfort the mourner, and urge food upon him 2 Samuel 12:17; food was also distributed at funerals to the mourners, and to the poor.

Cup of consolation - Marginal reference note.

Neither shall men tear themselves,.... Either their flesh, or their clothes: or, "stretch out" (y); that is, their hands, and clap them together, and wring them, as persons in great distress do: or "divide", or "break", or "deal unto them" (z); that is, bread, as at their funeral feasts. Thus the Septuagint version, neither shall bread be broken in their mourning; and to the same sense the Targum; so the word is used in Isaiah 63:7, a practice that obtained among the Heathens; see Deuteronomy 26:14 and now with the Jews, as it seems: which they did

for them in mourning, to comfort them for the dead; they used to carry or send food to the surviving relations, and went and ate with them, in order to comfort them for the loss of their friends; but this now would not be done, not because an Heathenish custom, but because they would have no heart nor leisure for it: see Ezekiel 24:17.

Neither shall men give them the cup of consolation to drink for their father or for their mother: not give them a cup of good liquor to comfort and cheer their spirits, overwhelmed with sorrow, on account of the death of a father or mother; which was wont to be done, but now should be omitted; the calamity would be so great, and so universal, that there would be none to do such offices as these; see Proverbs 31:6.

(y) "et non expandent, sub. manus suas", Vatablus, Montanus; "extendent", Pagninus, Calvin. So Kimchi and Ben Melech. (z) "Non divident", Tigurine version; "neque impertientur, sub. cibum", Junius & Tremellius; "partientur panem", Piscator; "neque cibum dabunt", Schmidt. So Jarchi, Joseph Kimchi, and Abarbinel.

פּרס, as in Isaiah 58:7, for פּרשׂ, Lamentations 4:4, break, sc. the bread (cf. Isa. l.c.) for mourning, and to give to drink the cup of comfort, does not refer to the meals which were held in the house of mourning upon occasion of a death after the interment, for this custom cannot be proved of the Israelites in Old Testament times, and is not strictly demanded by the words of the verse. To break bread to any one does not mean to hold a feast with him, but to bestow a gift of bread upon him; cf. Isaiah 58:7. Correspondingly, to give to drink, does not here mean to drink to one's health at a feast, but only to present with wine to drink. The words refer to the custom of sending bread and wine for refreshment into the house of the surviving relatives of one dead, to comfort them in their sorrow; cf. 2 Samuel 3:35; 2 Samuel 12:16., and the remarks on Ezekiel 24:17. The singular suffixes on לנחמו, אביו, and אמּו, alongside of the plurals להם and אותם, are to be taken distributively of every one who is to be comforted upon occasion of a death in his house; and להם is not to be changed, as by J. D. Mich. and Hitz., into לחם.

Neither shall men tear themselves for them in mourning, to comfort them for the dead; neither shall men give them the {d} cup of consolation to drink for their father or for their mother.

(d) For in these great extremities all consolation and comfort will be in vain.

16:7 Deal bread - It was a custom among them, when they had any friend, that had lost his relations, to send them some meat (for among the Hebrews all things they ate were called bread) and then to go and sup with them, and speak comfortably to them. The cup - They were also wont to send wine, that they might forget their sorrows; this is called, The cup of consolation.

tear...: or, break bread for them

7. tear themselves-rather, "break bread," namely, that eaten at the funeral-feast (De 26:14; Job 42:11; Eze 24:17; Ho 9:4). "Bread" is to be supplied, as in La 4:4; compare "take" (food) (Ge 42:33).

give . cup of consolation . for . father-It was the Oriental custom for friends to send viands and wine (the "cup of consolation") to console relatives in mourning-feasts, for example, to children upon the death of a "father" or "mother."

16:1-9 The prophet must conduct himself as one who expected to see his country ruined very shortly. In the prospect of sad times, he is to abstain from marriage, mourning for the dead, and pleasure. Those who would convince others of the truths of God, must make it appear by their self-denial, that they believe it themselves. Peace, inward and outward, family and public, is wholly the work of God, and from his loving-kindness and mercy. When He takes his peace from any people, distress must follow. There may be times when it is proper to avoid things otherwise our duty; and we should always sit loose to the pleasures and concerns of this life.